Fish Tales And Other Lies
Thursday, September 25, 2003
JingJangJohnnyJohnsonBoy is telling his tales elsewhere!
You can find me in my new home here. Stop over and check it out. Don't forget to update your links!
Friday, September 19, 2003
Yeah....that's the spot.
There's a place that is special to me. I was there a little over two years ago. It was September 11, 2001, but the date has nothing to do with why the place is special to me. I think of this spot almost every day, but especially this time of year. Why is it so great? I'm a fisherman and an outdoorsman. If people like me have a heaven on earth, this place is it! There is old growth forest, mountains, wildlife of all varieties, and salmon. My first morning there, I strolled to the riverbank with coffee in hand. We had arrived the night before after dark, so I had no idea what to expect. It looked like something out of National Geographic! The river was thick with Salmon, fresh from the ocean and beginning their journey upstream. I'd love to say that I caught one of these monstrous fish, but I can't. We were not equipped for this type of fishing. Perhaps that is one reason this place haunts me. My mind races with the thoughts of next time. Yeah, next time I'll be ready! Do you have a spot like this? Tell me about it.
Thursday, September 18, 2003
Brave or crazy?
OK. Enough is enough! People are out of control with this storm stuff. I'm in the western suburbs of Phila. The Storm is blasting away down on the coast of the Carolinas, but the forecast for this area is calling for wind gusts up to 40 MPH and between 2-5 inches of rain. Now call me crazy, but that aint shit! Everyone is talking about missing work tomorrow, and buying water. Come on people. We are not on the Outer Banks! It's nice to be prepared and all, but this thing is going to be over in 24 hours. Some basements will get wet, and some trees will fall on cars. Whoop-de-freaking-do! If you are frightened by this storm, you’ve been watching too much of the news.
Wednesday, September 17, 2003
Dogs for sale - two for the price of one!
I love dogs; just ask anyone. Today, I don't see the appeal so much. Why is this so JingJangJohnnyJohnsonBoy, you ask? Well, here is how my day began. The clock radio went off to Love Will Keep Us Together by the Captain & Tennille. OK, so not a great start, but the dogs can't be blamed for this atrocity. True, but it does say a lot about my state of mind as the next events unfold. I walk, with my lovable hounds happily jumping at my heels, towards the back door to let them out. As I hit the living room, a scene of unspeakable destruction unfolds before my sleepy eyes. The kitchen trash was hit hard, and scattered everywhere! Ruby Mae, oblivious to my rising blood pressure, pranced over the mess on her way to the exit. Obi, began to sense the danger, but he was not quick enough to dodge a swat from the nearest periodical. As I chased him out the door, I saw that Ruby was now alerted to her pending doom. This, of course means that she got scared and pissed on the floor. We think she was mistreated by her previous owner. So I get both dogs outside, and clean up the trash. I headed for the basement to get more paper towels, and notice a pile of fresh crap on the floor. By the time everything is cleaned up, I am seriously late for work, and Ruby will not come in the house for fear she will be beaten. I head out into the dim light of the early day to persuade her that all is well, and that she will live to see another day. Finally, the dogs are in and repenting and I head off to work, late and frazzled. About half way in, my senses awoke enough to smell crap. How could this be? I washed my hands thoroughly! Damn! I must have stepped on a land mine in my back yard. Sure enough, my left shoe was hit. Not only that, but it touched my pant leg as I got in the car. Now I can add the fact that I stink to the list - late, frazzled, pissed and smelly.
Tuesday, September 16, 2003
Damn kids!
I just read Buddha's last post, and it reminded me of a story from my youth. We were about 15 or 16, and there was a party at this girl’s house. Her trusting parents were away. I'm not sure how many people were invited, but the word spread and the house was soon rockin'. The beer supply ran dry. One of my friends had just gotten a driver's license, and I knew a place that would sell me beer (I was tall for my age). So off we went to get as many six packs as we could, without raising suspicion. We did pretty well that night - 6 six-packs. We were anxious to get back to the party, and enter as heroes. We, after all, saved the day. (Now keep in mind that the party was in typical suburbia, and every house looks the same.) So we park the car and the three musketeers exit and make a dash for the party. As we walk in the front door, things seem a little more subdued than when we left. Hey what's that kid doing hear in pajamas? Why are they watching the Wonderful World of Disney?
Oh Crap!!!
We were in the house next door. Out we ran, across the front yard and into the party. Before the night was over, some girl passed out, and I threw up near the front door. Yeah, that was some night.
What the -bleep-
I'm I the only one that can't see me #$@&ing comments!?!?!? What is up with this? My count goes up, but there's nothing there.
Well hello Dolly....
I'm not a big country music fan, but I don't think it's all bad either. I do appreciate a good song, no matter who wrote or performed it. Having said that, I'll get to the point. I heard a track from a new Dolly Parton tribute album . Now stay with me here. I know she's a little over the top with the hair, the twang, and the....you know......the twin peaks. None of that makes her a bad singer or song writer though. Like her or not, it would be tough to argue her talent. There are some great voices on the album. I honestly don't know most of the songs (see line one of this post), but the one I heard this morning was very nice. Nora Jones sang The Grass Is Blue. I'm not ready to wear my Stetson, while doing the two-step down at the dew-drop-inn or anything. This could be an interesting album to hear more of. That's all I'm saying.
Monday, September 15, 2003
What is going on with these pop-up adds
They’re out of control! How am I supposed to surf at work, when every site I hit opens four more windows. Is it just me, or has it gotten much worse lately. You expect it, when you go to certain sites (gambling, porn, etc......not that I do), but Damn! Enough already - I'm not going to buy what you're selling, so get out of my face.
Are you ready for some football?!
I am. I haven't been able to sit through a whole game yet. I can accept that my team will not win every game. I do, however, expect them to show signs of life; a glimmer of hope. I'm not getting that from the Philadelphia Eagles. They are a bad football team, with no entertaining qualities. Our coach has no clue how to turn this team around, so as a public service I will throw my own ideas out there.
The Eagles should become a two quarterback team. You could have McNabb to one side of the center and Detmer at the other side. In the huddle, they play rock/paper/scissors to determine where the snap goes. Since McNabb can't pass, he should earn his money running with the ball. If Detmer gets the ball, maybe he can complete a pass.
If nothing else, other teams will be confused and have trouble defending this style of play. I know it wouldn't be boring. What do you think?
Friday, September 12, 2003
Yup, that's me.
I got this Name Analysis from Cornelia. I have to give her credit because you should check her out, and because Melissa told me so.
Any way, here's what my name says about me:
The name of John has made you serious-minded, responsible, and stable. You love the security of a home and family, you are fond of children, and, as a parent you would be fair and understanding. Although you have good business judgment, you are not aggressive in your dealings because you do not like to create issues. You would be successful in any position dealing with the public as you have a diplomatic and tactful manner and possess a charming, easy-going nature which puts people at ease. People are drawn to you because they feel that you are patient, kind, understanding, and responsive. You would be effective in a career or in volunteer work where you are handling people and serving in a humanitarian way. While you are honest and responsible, one weakness that is paramount in your life is your lack of self-confidence and initiative, which causes you to put things off and avoid facing issues.
The loss of a giant
I heard the news today, that Johnny Cash was dead. I can't say that I was ever a big fan, but I always knew that he was a giant in the country music scene. He'll be missed.
Whole lotta shakin' goin' on.
Well, my dog Obi has started to have seizures. He predecessor Grady had seizures too. It's scary stuff. They can't control their muscles and their eyes get crazy. Obi's passed within a few minutes, but it seemed longer. I'm sure it felt like an hour to him, the poor guy. I guess we'll have to put him on Phenobarbital too. That's what Grady took for his. I want to wait for a while to see if he has any more "spells". I hate to give him pills if he doesn’t need them. A lifetime of chemicals is no good for him. That's two dogs in a row. If little Ruby Mae starts to have them, I'm going to wonder if there is something in the house or the water that is causing them. I think I'll just drink beer for a while, just in case.
